Jeez! I get up this morning, ready to start with the whole sneaking about as a royal guard thing, and what's the first thing that happens? There's an announcement about a freaking murderer in the castle!
Here's how it goes, diary. Last night, one of the nobles got attacked while walking from the library to his apartments in the nobles' wing. The guy got away safe and sound, but he said that even in the dark he could tell that his attacker was an orc! Another freaking orc, and this one not very polite indeed!
After the noble reported the incident they had him go through a bunch of wanted poster pictures, and the one he picked out as the culprit was an infamous dude called Casimiro the Butcher. He's wanted for over a dozen aristocratic killings in the Imperium, and a bunch more out here in the kingdoms. Which means I'm safe, bein' a guard and all, but this is bad, y'know?
At the same time, though, it wasn't the worst thing in the world, 'cause it gave me a chance to parade around the halls like all the other royal guards without anybody bein' suspicious. Which, I guess, is exactly what The Baron wanted: I have an excuse for tailing anyone I come across, to ensure their safety. That includes Driscol the Count. The Baron wants me to keep track of where he goes, and by the gods, the murder stuff is the perfect alibi for doin' just that.
(Though if there is a murderer about, I'd rather Driscol, y'know, get killed. That's so mean of me, but judging by The Baron's concerns, the count probably deserves whatever he gets!)
After visiting The Baron to pick up my outfit (not allowed to take it home) I set about finding Driscol and following him wherever he went. That wasn't hard, 'cause he's got some stake in castle security, and he spent most of the day running around and coordinating with the guards and soldiers. Even gave me orders a couple times, though as soon as he went out of sight I'd keep following him again. Thank god he doesn't recognize me in this giant-ass bucket helmet.
Which brings me to another point! This outfit is STUPID! It's so top-heavy. The armour is loose as hell, the sleeves are made of some gentle, flowing, pinky fabric that's not protective AT ALL, and the helmet weighs, like, fifty pounds. It hurts my neck after a while. And to make things worse we've had to tape a spear to my wrist to make me look more natural, and if I even THINK of using it as a weapon, it drops right off! What the bugger!
Damned royal guards. Nothing's good about 'em.
Anyway. Following Driscol didn't get me anywhere 'cause he was on 'official' business the entire day, as far as I could tell. The only time he appeared to be gettin' secretive was when he disappeared into Lady Evangelina's quarters for a couple hours, and I bet they weren't so much talking as 'snuggling'.
If ya know what I mean.
Sigh. Libby's so mean. I keep suggesting, she keeps hitting. Don't adults just, like, DO this sort of thing? Sigh… seems like I never see her anymore.
Anyway. Nothing to report today, long story short. I'm back at it tomorrow. Hope nobody gets murdered in the meantime.
Sincerely,
Dragomir the Royal Guard
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