Thursday, August 4, 2011

Day Four: On rats


Castle Bitc

Dammit! The day was going so well and I ruined it.

But good news, diary! I found you a home! I mean, your rat skin cover is your home, but I found another home. So it’s like a home for a home for you. Kinda like my quarters are in the apartment district, which is in the castle, which is on the plains, which are on the... world. You know what I mean?

Anyway. I had to guard the rat farms last night, and since they’re so boring I did a lot of walking around and poking into stuff I shouldn’t. Eventually I found a bunch of old ledgers in a back room. It looks like they haven’t been touched in ages, ‘cause they’re covered in some weird yellow dust. I did my best to brush it off my clothes, and it doesn’t seem to stain, but... I'm kinda yellow now.

And sneezy. This stuff goes right up your nose. Tickles. I like to pretend it's playing with my nose hair, but I can never tell if that's true or not.

Well, the point is this ledger room is the perfect place to hide you, diary. Nobody’s been here in a long time. I guess there are so many rats that there’s no point keeping track. And even if someone comes down here, you look the exact same as the ledgers. I doubt anyone will bother to read you. Perfect!

... though it does mean I have to come to the rat farms every night.

I hate the rat farms. They’re creepy. Something’s always moving here, and it’s always a rat. They’re kept in giant wooden pens, but they can sneak out easily 'cause the pens are made for livestock, not itty-bitty rats. The only reason most of the rats stay here is ‘cause they’re always being fed, through big chutes in the roof. They must think those chutes are gods or something. I wonder if they’d all revolt if they knew what they were eating?

Probably not. They’re just rats. Rats aren’t picky.

Time to leave, diary. Enjoy your new home. I hope I don’t cough so much next time I visit. That yellow stuff smells like old bananas.

Sincerely,

Dragomir the Guard

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